Timbers owner Merritt Paulson provides on-field commentary of 2nd annual Stumptown Derby charity match | SIDELINE

Never afraid to speak his mind, the Portland Timbers' Merritt Paulson is known as one of the more outspoken owners in MLS.

Imagine what it would be like to hear his every thought during a Timbers match.

We got the next best thing on Tuesday at the 2nd annual Stumptown Derby, where Paulson was miked up for the entire match and offered some priceless one-liners.

"You know what? That's a million-dollar move and a two-cent finish," he said after one attempt on goal by the Timbers' rivals on the day. And yet this was supposed to be a charity match.

Members of the Timbers front office — including Paulson, head coach Caleb Porter and general manager Gavin Wilkinson — hosted the benefit game against their crosstown friends and partners from adidas North America in the name of Operation Pitch Invasion's Bless Field.

The stakes were simple: a $3,000 donation from the losing side was on the line, as well as an extra donation of $300 for every goal conceded. In that event, a goal-filled bonanza was in the best interest of everyone involved.

The final score was 5-4, in favor of the adidas North America side and altogether, a donation of $5,700 was made to Operation Pitch Invasion, which will aid in building Bless Field, a youth-sized all-season pitch for the kids of Portland’s New Columbia neighborhood.

Paulson was especially in a giving mood, gifting the Seattle Sounders a latest zinger that won't go down too well at CenturyLink Field.

"Holy cow, we've got a band. It's like Seattle," Paulson said about the music accompaniment on hand for the game. "That's officially the only time a band will ever come into JELD-WEN Field for one of our games. No confetti, no marching bands."


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