For this week's column, I decided to get my teammates involved. I asked five of the guys hanging around the locker room before training a series of rapid-fire questions I thought of that covered a wide range of topics. From the best league fans, to bad CD's, to getting heckled during games, nothing was out of bounds, and I got some pretty funny answers. Here we go with the questions, followed by each player's answers, plus a little commentary thrown in there by myself. The five subjects chosen for this first experiment were Evan Whitfield, Jesse Marsch, C.J. Brown, Henry Ring, Ante Razov, and myself, Jim Curtin.
EW: San Jose
JM: D.C. United
CJ: San Jose
HR: Boston Red Sox
AR: L.A Lakers
JC: D.C. United
EW: Mark Lisi
JM: Mark Chung
CJ: Zach Thornton (Said while Henry Ring was next to me and C.J during the interview, and was listening to C.J.'s answers. We all laughed pretty loud.)
HR: John Spencer
AR: Landon Donovan
JC: Carlos Ruiz
EW: "RFK Stadium two years ago while limping off the field with what turned out to be a torn ACL and heading towards the tunnel. A guy pelted me with a box of popcorn and cursed at me, 'You deserve everything you get you worthless piece of ---- Whitfield!"
JM: "While walking down the street in Washington D.C. with Fire general manager Peter Wilt (who was wearing a Chicago Fire polo shirt) this guy came up to us and was like 'Yeah! Alright Chicago Fire, Peter Nowak Rules!' Peter Wilt chimed back, realizing the guy did not know who I was, 'Yeah Jesse Marsch.' And in a disgusted voice the guy yells back, 'Jesse Marsch, that guy ------- stinks!' I guess you could say that was an indirect heckling story.
CJ: "Since I'm from the area, they usually give it to me pretty good in San Jose. There was an entire group of them yelling, 'C.J., C.J., C.J.!' and anytime I'd look up to them, they would yell 'You stink!' Here I am thinking I'm getting a hometown welcome when actually they were just screaming curses at me. They also get me with the 'U.S. reject' chant."
HR: "The first game this season in Kansas City, in my pro debut [as a starter], these guys by the goal were screaming pretty good at me. One of them yells out at the top of his lungs 'Hey Countess, the only reason you're starting is because Henry Ring bleeping sucks!' It was a double insult because not only did they not know I was Henry Ring, but they used my name to insult the goalkeeper that they thought was D.J. Countess. It was embarrassing.
AR: "New York gets me pretty bad with the 'U.S. reject' chants."
JC: It would take another article for me to tell some of my getting-heckled stories, so in brief summary: San Jose = 'Dirk Nowitzki'; Columbus = 'Dude from Blue Lagoon'; Kansas City = 'Jimaaaaaagh'; Los Angeles = 'Alexi Lalas' or 'Bill Walton'; New York = 'Big Bird'; New England = 'Larry Bird'; D.C. United = 'Curse words' - details to follow."
EW: Material Issue - Pop Overthrow (I have no idea either, but Evan described their sound as 'Crappy '90s British Alternative.' Isn't that some kind of oxymoron?)
JM: Spicegirls - Spiceworld (I'll leave Jesse to himself on that one - too easy.)
CJ: Vanilla Ice - To the Extreme (Everybody made that mistake.)
HR: M.C. Hammer - Please Hammer, Don't Hurt 'Em (Terrible.)
AR: Maxi Priest (So bad we had no idea what the album was called.)
JC: Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch - Feel the Vibrations (I apologize to my family.)
EW: Junior Agogo
JM: Joe Franchino
CJ: Joe Franchino
HR: Craig Waibel
AR: Joe Franchino
JC: Joe Franchino
HR: Jessica Aguilera (Clever.)
JM: In and Out Burger
HR: Krystal (I'm guessing a southern thing.)
AR: In and Out Burger
EW: Different Strokes
JM: Different Strokes
CJ: What's Happening?
HR: Mama's Family
AR: What's Happening
JC: Different Strokes (The ones without the annoying red head brat Sam.)
Dave Chappelle in a clean sweep.
EW: Jesse Marsch
JM: Me, but Ante is a close second.
CJ: Jesse Marsch
HR: Jesse Marsch
AR: Jesse Marsch
JC: Jesse Marsch
For comments, questions or more round table discussion topics, please send Jim an email at firstname.lastname@example.org.