It’s Friday. You likely feel like Getty Images’ "medium shot baboon pounding on laptop keyboard." You’re just ticking down the minutes to a little taste of soccer-filled weekend freedom. (Can we remind you it's Heineken Rivalry Week?) Let’s help you kill another minute or so, shall we?
Imagine a world [movie trailer voice] in which the USMNT has to duke it out on the field … among themselves. And that field is a literal field on a deserted island, because they’ve crash-landed there, and have now got to survive a kind of Lost meets Lord of the Flies test of will to live.
Such is the world of Eden, a forthcoming new movie, due out September 18, whose trailer just dropped. No, it doesn’t feature actual, real life USMNT players; but yes, it does feature a fictionalized national team marooned after a plane crash.
Why does the world need another humans-going-feral-on-an-island tale? Why does the world need yet another movie titled Eden, when there is this long list of other ones on IMDB already? Why is this one about North American soccer? I’m sure you have a lot of questions. So do we.
But let’s ignore the many whys about this and think about the what-ifs. What if our current USMNT roster got dumped somewhere like this? Who would be first to go? Who’d wind up the leader? Who would just cry a lot?
Feel free to while away a little more time pondering it all.
