Clint Dempsey is straight flexin' on that fishing game in East Texas | THE SIDELINE

We're actually not sure if Clint Dempsey is actually in East Texas — he hails from Nacogdoches, as the world knows — but wherever in the beautiful United States he may be at the moment, he's got that good stink bait, and probably a can of his favorite Modelo beer, working in his favor.

Dempsey finished his 2012-13 soccer campaign on Tuesday night with the US national team's 1-0 victory over Honduras — their fourth straight World Cup qualifying victory — and now it's a solid month of Deuce just doing what Deuce does: catching some big ol' bass out of those Texas lakes.

I don't care about the goals he scores for the national team; Clint Dempsey's greatest contribution to this country will be his future fishing-while-rapping reality television series on The Outdoor Network once his playing days are over. Then, and only then, will Clint Dempsey be a national hero.

Naturally, the week's prime catches have already made it to Dempsey's official Instagram account and garnered thousands upon thousands of likes from real, true Americans.

Bumpy Pitch, represent.

Best to think twice before you tread on this, folks.